Good Morning My Fellow Citizens of Fort Worth:
Today is Thursday January 15, 2009.
The ambient air temperature this morning is 30 degrees Fahrenheit, which is 1.111 degrees Celsius in case you were wondering.
Do you know what that means?
It means that it is fricken cold outside.
Please do me a favor--
Put on some clothes on, will you?
We do not, I repeat, DO NOT live in Miami.
If I see you in shorts and flip flops today, I am telling your Mother.
Very truly yours,