Instead of wearing my heart on my sleeve, I apparently wear my disdain, disgust, shock, surprise, and angst on my face. I think this may explain why I have never been successful at poker.
It may also explain why small children and house pets cower in my presence.
All I can say to this shocking revelation is; Why didn’t you bastards tell me sooner? If the reported observations are correct, I have been walking around for the nearly 102 years of my life exposing my inner most feelings to the world without any knowledge of my actions. What goes on between my brain and I is confidential.
It appears my facial features have betrayed me.
After hearing this tragic news my first impulse was to make an appointment at Dr. 90201’s office for a heavy dose of Botox. A paralyzed face cannot involuntarily contort, now can it? Then I considered seeking employment at a movie theatre, or perhaps a coalmine, some place dark where I can avoid embarrassment.
For now, I think I will just practice my jazz hands while I wait for Mr. Wonderful.
Was that the doorbell?
http://www.easyletters.net/image/monkey-see-monkey-do.jpg, http://entertainingconx.com/images/laura4.jpg, http://www.flickr.com/photos/23097960@N04/2356327944/