The only thing that comes to my mind is the unfortunate Creepy Crawler incident of my second grade year when I convinced Brian Christensen, (Another dumb boy), that it really, truly, cross my heart, would be OK to make Creepy Crawlers in his basement with the new Creepy Crawler maker that he got for Christmas, even though he promised his mother that he never, ever, would make Creepy Crawlers, unless his mother was there, and she wasn’t, but, I promised it would be OK, because I knew exactly what I was doing, which I didn’t.
Anyway, when Brian Christensen’s mother caught us in the basement making Creepy Crawlers, even though he knew that it was not allowed, and even though he knew he would get grounded, or dead, or whatever, when his dad got home. When that happened, I offered to show Brian Christensen my underpants to make him forget that it was my fault that he was grounded and soon to be dead.
Brian Christensen accepted my generous offer, and guess what? It worked, I had magic underpants! He was impressed, and not mad at me at all.
Obviously, now, my magic underpants seem like they may be the only answer to my problem. I could just ask “Would it make you feel better if I showed you my underpants?”, and then close my eyes and pray he doesn't stab me. I am pretty sure that is a good idea, except he is not seven, and he has seen underpants before. He might just stab me anyway. Underpants or no underpants.
That is why I need your advice.
Thank you in advance,