Saturday, July 12, 2008

Don't Mess With Texas


One might wonder if officers at the Lake Worth Texas Police Department were already high when Christian Philips , an 18 year old from nearby Watauga, dropped off a batch of homemade cookies for Mothers Against Drunk Driving at the police station last week. Philips was delivering the cookies for MADD to complete his required community service hours for an incident at a party in Watauga earlier in the year.

It seems that it was a slow business day for cops in the good city of Lake Worth. No sightings of the Lake Worth Monster or alligators had been reported. None of the upstanding citizens of the city had inadvertently shot themselves with the guns they carry to work.

When the teenager dropped off a basket of tasty treats, he was detained because one of the officers thought the cookies smelled like marijuana. It is not clear if the cookies were flaming at the time of delivery, how exactly the officer determined the cookies smelled like pot, or most importantly why any kid with a bag of good weed would bake it up in cookies and give it to the police. It seems more likely he would give them to someone he liked.

A preliminary field test was positive for LSD. How one makes the leap from marijuana to LSD or brownies to cookies is unclear, but apparently, logic is not required when protecting the public and its peace officers from crazed cookie boys.

"No good deed goes unpunished" is apparently the motto at the Lake Worth P.D. Philips was arrested, charged with tampering with a consumer product and held on a 75 thousand dollar bond. Aside from being in jail, the teenagers face was flashed across media outlets around the country in what was clearly a rush to judgment. As it turns out the cookies did not contain drugs of any kind, only chocolate chips.

Approximately three days later Philips was released from jail with the apologies of the Lake Worth Police Department. Further evidence that you "Don't Mess With Texas"
Out-T.


2 comments:

Anonymous said...

i heard all about the cookies (brownies), but i guess the fact that he was innocent wasn't as news-worthy.what a-holes!

Tobi said...

Anon.- No, it was not. The tampering charge carries a 20 year sentence! Seems like a little (oh, I don't know) evidence!? would have been "a good thing"